The three most recent schools at which I've taught have been multilingual in all kinds of ways. First there was the English Hebrew Russian milieu on Brotherhood Way, and then the Hebrew Arabic English remix in East Jerusalem. Now there is the English Spanish Tagalog mash-up in SOMA and what can I say? I know how to say "hello" a million different ways. Have I mentioned I am also a very skilled French speaker? Different story...
All of this is actually fascinating to me because I love to learn, and learn about, languages. I taught myself Japanese and Italian growing up, I built my skills in French from early childhood all through college, and then of course things flip-flopped from right to left and I learned Hebrew. I love alphabets, I love the sounds letters make alone and combined, and almost more than anything I love idioms. Recently I wrote an entire article about the ways in which English, as adopted by speakers of other languages, is being mis-learned and then these tangled-up linguistic accidents are becoming part of actual mainstream native-speaker language. I did it just the other day: "Oh! Look at that fabulous necklace," Sage exclaimed, looping her fingers through the silver chain and well-worn charms. "Where did you get it?" "From the (insert name of turn-of-the-millenium dot-com boyfriend here)," I replied. What? We don't say "the" before people's names in this language. Or as Jody wrote on my facebook page recently, in response to a Friday afternoon indulgence I'd bragged about in my status update: "I love me some popsicle..." Huh? What?! An indefinite article before a noun that names a definite item? Sigh...
Then there are all the funny things that just can't be translated. They're everywhere you listen, really. When I asked her if I could borrow one today, our school librarian was describing how never has a staple remover because she does not use them, she uses her fingernails instead. But, she promised, she would keep her eyes out for a staple remover "from now on" and pass it along to me the next time she came across one. "From now on?" the native Spanish speaker with me asked, quizzically. "Like from now, going forward, until the time that she finds one..." I tried explaining, my efforts met with a blank stare.
Perhaps the most humorous of these was recently in the office of my principal where we found ourselves actually separated by our common language, English: We were talking when the phone rang and, recognizing the number, he answered it. "Ah, yes, yes....I see, okay....certainly. Kindly hold. Kindly hold...kindly...hold...?" He looked at me with confusion, his finger poised over the transfer button but the person on the other end of the line unable to understand that they should wait. "What should I say?" he asked me in a stage whisper, covering the mouthpiece so the person on the other end couldn't hear. "They won't wait, they keep talking!"
"Hold, please," I responded.
"Hold, please?" he repeated, hand over mouthpiece, confused.
"Hold, PLEASE, that is what you say to them to make them stop talking," I instructed.
"OH! Hold, PLEASE," he said with new confidence into the telephone. And just like that, he pressed the transfer button and replaced the handset into the cradle. "How did you know to say that?" he asked, mystified.
"I'm not sure, I think that's just what you say. I'm not sure people are so very familiar with the expression 'kindly hold'," I told him.
"Well good, it worked," he said with finality as he turned away from the phone and rose from his desk. "Now I know."
hmmm. i think "hold, please" is not "what you say" (as in, what one says), but it is in fact "what YOU say." i think this because sage and i, when wanting the other to stop talking for a minute because we can't hear or need to do something before continuing to listen, say "hold, please" in our very best sarah kotleba manner, both of us knowing that it is, in fact, a kotleba-ism, and not what people say generally. sorry to break it to you. very effective, though, i agree.
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